Day 37 "Unlike the drug addict who realizes that he or she must totally walk away from all narcotics, we who struggle with our eating behaviors cannot give up eating entirely, for obvious reasons. Our struggle is more subtle than that.'
When I realized that this journey was different from the previous I decided to look ahead. As I considered the day that I would be at a 50 lb loss, then a 60 lb loss and now almost 70, I pondered what I would do to keep it off. Would I manage to beat the horrible statistics of those that gain it all back and then some? Is that because they didn't plan ahead? Did they forget that there is discipline needed to keep it off? In my thought processing about this I decided to plan ahead. I opted to do something I had only dreamed about...never believing I would be in a position to pull it off. I wanted to teach aerobics. Zumba to be more specific. Knowing that at some point I would waiver in my desire to exercise on any given day, I opted to teach. After all...I couldn't just call in sick every time I didn't feel like it. No stubbed toe, belly aching excuses would be acceptable to an employer on any given day. Nor would the participants be happy if I just decided to take a day off for every whim and lack of desire I had. I know my personality and it isn't in my character to just not show up to something I have agreed to unless it is a big reason. Teaching Zumba would be my obligation to myself to keep up the work required.
Looking ahead to our pitfalls, those things that cause us to lose ground we need the guidance of God. My heavenly Father knew I would need discipline to keep the weight off. Daily communication with Him helps me keep this forefront in my mind. Teaching requires me to have discipline. This is where I need God most. I need that discipline to stay on track. To take the time to learn the new choreography. He is there teaching me and warning me of pitfalls ahead. Trust!
What is your pitfall? Have you thought ahead? How can God help you avoid yours?
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Faithfully Fit day 36
People have asked me over and over "How much weight do you have to lose?" "What is your goal weight?" I realize that these are important questions. It is important to set goals for ourselves to stretch us and give us incentive However...this journey, unlike my attempts in the past is not driven by a specific weight goal. One of the things that set this journey apart from past failures was that I only wanted to be healthy. No specific weight or size. No unattainable expectations this time. Only to be healthy; ready to live a life free of limitations caused by excess baggage and bad choices.
Today as I read about the attitude we should have for our bodily temple I realized that my thoughts on not setting a final weight/ size goes right along with the fact that God knows where he is taking me. I highly doubt that at the finish line of my journey I will have small thighs. I'm pretty sure that despite a massive loss of weight I will still have hanging skin. Though I would love for Him to deliver me from this leftover mess I will accept myself right where He takes me. He made me, He knew me before I was born. I trust Him to deliver me to His acceptable goal weight/size.
Today as I read about the attitude we should have for our bodily temple I realized that my thoughts on not setting a final weight/ size goes right along with the fact that God knows where he is taking me. I highly doubt that at the finish line of my journey I will have small thighs. I'm pretty sure that despite a massive loss of weight I will still have hanging skin. Though I would love for Him to deliver me from this leftover mess I will accept myself right where He takes me. He made me, He knew me before I was born. I trust Him to deliver me to His acceptable goal weight/size.
Faithfully Fit day 33-35
As I finished out my week on choosing I was thinking about something my pastor said in his sermon a few weeks back. Staying in God's will and following his directives, laid out clearly in his word is like staying under the protection of an umbrella. Under His umbrella we can experience protection, promotion and blessing. If we make the choice to move out from underneath it we are may find ourselves open to the elements. The poor choices we make have consequences.
It wasn't long before I was reflecting on how this can be applied to my food plan and exercise. Staying under the umbrella by making good choices, I find promotion (establishing a better self esteem), protection (from disease and weight gain) and blessings (too many to write). When I step out from beneath it I will experience the effects of my poor choices.
Why then do we constantly seek to fight against what we know to be the right thing to do? Human nature....selfishness...??? I hope for more better choices in my future. One at a time!
It wasn't long before I was reflecting on how this can be applied to my food plan and exercise. Staying under the umbrella by making good choices, I find promotion (establishing a better self esteem), protection (from disease and weight gain) and blessings (too many to write). When I step out from beneath it I will experience the effects of my poor choices.
Why then do we constantly seek to fight against what we know to be the right thing to do? Human nature....selfishness...??? I hope for more better choices in my future. One at a time!
Faithfully Fit day 32
While reading day, 32 one of my favorite sayings came to mind. "Touch it once." I used to say this all the time to myself to help me keep from letting my house become too cluttered. As I would go through my day I would make the choice to "touch it once". Use it and put it away. Over time, the accumulative effect of this was a tidy house and no need to spend endless hours searching for things that I had somehow misplaced.
So...reading about Richard constantly making the choice to eat the right thing or do the exercise I thought about how this had given him quite a nice cumulative effect. When we keep our choice making in the forefront and in prayer we really can make better choices.
Well...I have decided to take the "making the better choice" challenge for myself and also...to re-institute my "touch it once" policy.
So...reading about Richard constantly making the choice to eat the right thing or do the exercise I thought about how this had given him quite a nice cumulative effect. When we keep our choice making in the forefront and in prayer we really can make better choices.
Well...I have decided to take the "making the better choice" challenge for myself and also...to re-institute my "touch it once" policy.
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Faithfully Fit Day 29
Day 29:
http://youtu.be/3wzkKs0TOTs
I posted a link to the Yoplait commercial. When I saw this last night on TV I thought about how I do the very same thing when it comes to making choices. Every scenario she thought of I would have thought of. It is amazing to me how much power food has over me. I like day 29's reminder to pray about the day ahead. Praying over my food choices will not only bring help from God but also further implant in my psyche that I want to make good choices.
Have you ever thought..."well....If I had a lot of money, a personal chef and trainer (like Oprah and other superstars) I would be thin too"?
How many times have you asked your spouse to be your accountability? Then...when he/she questioned your choice making, did you get angry? I did!!
It still boils down to my every choice. Oprah and I can both get into our cars and go to the corner market to SNEAK in a bad choice. I can certainly sabotage myself out of the view of others. It comes down to me, acknowledging the fact that I got myself into this mess and it is only MY choice-making that can get me out.
http://youtu.be/3wzkKs0TOTs
I posted a link to the Yoplait commercial. When I saw this last night on TV I thought about how I do the very same thing when it comes to making choices. Every scenario she thought of I would have thought of. It is amazing to me how much power food has over me. I like day 29's reminder to pray about the day ahead. Praying over my food choices will not only bring help from God but also further implant in my psyche that I want to make good choices.
Have you ever thought..."well....If I had a lot of money, a personal chef and trainer (like Oprah and other superstars) I would be thin too"?
How many times have you asked your spouse to be your accountability? Then...when he/she questioned your choice making, did you get angry? I did!!
It still boils down to my every choice. Oprah and I can both get into our cars and go to the corner market to SNEAK in a bad choice. I can certainly sabotage myself out of the view of others. It comes down to me, acknowledging the fact that I got myself into this mess and it is only MY choice-making that can get me out.
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Faithfully Fit day 26
Keep on keeping on:
As Paul was moving forward to be more Christlike and follow Christ at all costs be told us: Phil.3:13-14 "I know that I have not yet reached the goal, but there is one thing I always do. Forgetting the past and straining toward what is ahead, I keep trying to reach the goal and get the prize for which God called me through Christ to the life above."
This would be a true statement for me and hopefully all Christians. It led me to consider this striving in regards to my weight loss journey. What is this race I'm running? What is the prize I am pursuing? What am I willing to do for it?
When I was young my answer may have easily been to look good; to be thin; to be a size 7; to be considered pretty, dateable, worthy of attention. Wow....as I type this I realize just how far I have come. Now this race has a much more noble finish line. I race for my health, my life. My prize will be much more than the end result of a thin waistline, nice legs, smaller clothes or unmerited attention from shallow people who look only at the outer shell of my being. Now I pursue a healthy life in which I can be used more readily for the service of God. That He would use our (His and my) successes to encourage others. Not only on their weight loss journey but also in their walk with Him.
Before the journey began I wanted to go on a mission trip to a foreign country. I had a desire to do more, see more and understand more about the love of Christ to a world less rich (monetarily speaking) than I. What held me back was my weight. I was sure I would make it to the location and not be able to perform the work due to my physical limitations. That I would find myself sick and in a foreign, less than adequate hospital. Surely, I know now, that my lack of faith in Christ keeping me safe along with the weight is truly what held me back. Now I see that I can add this prize to the journey. Not necessarily the end because I see that it was the faith part that I needed in this. A lesson taught on His timeline and not my own.
So....what am I willing to do for it? To reach the prize....what am I willing to give up, start doing or change? I know I have to change my behaviors into ones of diligence in the areas of prayer, eating, exercise and trusting in Him. Onward and UPward I go.
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Faithfully Fit day 22-23
Day 22:
So I must admit that I was a bit freaked out that this week was based on patience. Yikes! We all know what praying for patience brings.....initially. Well...at least it will be better in the long run right?!
As with just about anything worthwhile, losing weight should take time. I don't think I have ever appreciated anything that was handed to me on a silver platter. The things in my life I have striven for with passion, integrity, persistence and diligence are some of the things that mean the most to me.
After years of trying all the tricks in the book to lose weight...find success...back to failure...new gimmick...success....failure, I find that they didn't bring a lasting result. It was when, with the help of God, I decided that one pound a week was a worthwhile, attainable goal that I was able actually stick with my new food/exercise lifestyle. It was a short term goal that I could do with the simple changes I had made. It also freed me from the constant barrage of unrealistic goals unmet. God promises us that if we just rest and trust in Him all things are taken care of. He taught me I only had to get through today. Tomorrow...with it's challenges...would come soon enough and we could conquer that; together. As one day led to another, one week to another I was able to see the accrued result of my patience and trust in Him.
Day 23: When my girlfriends daughter was just a baby she had a peculiar craving. Being just at the age of finger foods, all she seemed to want was cheerios. Occasionally she would add in another item but went right back to the cheerios. Concerned, my friend mentioned this to the pediatrician. She responding by letting my friend know that the child's body was needing something in those cheerios and just to be sure to give her anything else she would eat when she could. The child eventually moved on and grew up quite normal. God has designed our bodies to know what we need when we need it. Too bad we aren't very good listeners to our body.
Yesterday I started counting weight watcher points again. I went about my day with what I thought was an appropriate amount of food stretched across the hours. As 3:00pm rolled around I felt the forgotten feeling of hunger pains. What was this odd feeling? I felt sickly...a bit nauseous or weak. It took me a few minutes to realize that I wasn't truly sick...I was hungry. In the days and weeks prior I obviously hadn't been listening to my body in the area of its need, or lack of need for food. God created my being. He has designed me, us, with a body that let's us know its needs. I, for one, need to be a better listener. I need to respond to it's needs knowing full well that the Holy spirit is right there encouraging me. Access, PRAY, respond. I want to respond in a way that pleases the Lord. I may not get it right every time but I do believe there are blessings for those who respond appropriately to the creation God has made.
Philippians 2:13 God is working in you to help you want to do and be able to do what pleases him.
Amen!! God grant me not just the help but the desire to do what is pleasing to you.
So I must admit that I was a bit freaked out that this week was based on patience. Yikes! We all know what praying for patience brings.....initially. Well...at least it will be better in the long run right?!
As with just about anything worthwhile, losing weight should take time. I don't think I have ever appreciated anything that was handed to me on a silver platter. The things in my life I have striven for with passion, integrity, persistence and diligence are some of the things that mean the most to me.
After years of trying all the tricks in the book to lose weight...find success...back to failure...new gimmick...success....failure, I find that they didn't bring a lasting result. It was when, with the help of God, I decided that one pound a week was a worthwhile, attainable goal that I was able actually stick with my new food/exercise lifestyle. It was a short term goal that I could do with the simple changes I had made. It also freed me from the constant barrage of unrealistic goals unmet. God promises us that if we just rest and trust in Him all things are taken care of. He taught me I only had to get through today. Tomorrow...with it's challenges...would come soon enough and we could conquer that; together. As one day led to another, one week to another I was able to see the accrued result of my patience and trust in Him.
Day 23: When my girlfriends daughter was just a baby she had a peculiar craving. Being just at the age of finger foods, all she seemed to want was cheerios. Occasionally she would add in another item but went right back to the cheerios. Concerned, my friend mentioned this to the pediatrician. She responding by letting my friend know that the child's body was needing something in those cheerios and just to be sure to give her anything else she would eat when she could. The child eventually moved on and grew up quite normal. God has designed our bodies to know what we need when we need it. Too bad we aren't very good listeners to our body.
Yesterday I started counting weight watcher points again. I went about my day with what I thought was an appropriate amount of food stretched across the hours. As 3:00pm rolled around I felt the forgotten feeling of hunger pains. What was this odd feeling? I felt sickly...a bit nauseous or weak. It took me a few minutes to realize that I wasn't truly sick...I was hungry. In the days and weeks prior I obviously hadn't been listening to my body in the area of its need, or lack of need for food. God created my being. He has designed me, us, with a body that let's us know its needs. I, for one, need to be a better listener. I need to respond to it's needs knowing full well that the Holy spirit is right there encouraging me. Access, PRAY, respond. I want to respond in a way that pleases the Lord. I may not get it right every time but I do believe there are blessings for those who respond appropriately to the creation God has made.
Philippians 2:13 God is working in you to help you want to do and be able to do what pleases him.
Amen!! God grant me not just the help but the desire to do what is pleasing to you.
Monday, May 23, 2011
Faithfully Fit day 21
Until today I never realized that I look at food both as my friend and my enemy. How should I see it? Perhaps I should see it neither way.
If food is my friend, it takes the place of my true friend and helper, God. I should be going to Him in prayer when I need comfort or when I want to celebrate. I'm not saying that I shouldn't eat during those times....but I am realizing that I should recognize the situation and either ask for help or give thanks for the celebration. Giving a proper perspective to my relationship with the food in front of me. Food is NOT my friend; God is.
If I view food as my enemy I see that it tempts, frustrates and depresses me. These are the same characteristics of Satan. In Genesis God gave us dominion over food...therefore it cannot be my enemy. Truly it is the lies of Satan that bring me to my knees in front of the plate rather than in front of a holy God asking for help. If I would daily take the time to view my food through the eyes of a healthy child of God, I would begin to view it for what it is; a gift.
So....where am I going with this today. Not all gifts are the same. Not all are worth keeping or consuming. Nor should i take on the gluttonous behavior of a greedy child hoarding gifts. As I eat today I am praying for help from my faithful friend. Is this fruit a good gift? This candy bar? This pizza, taco, cupcake, rice, tortilla chip, candy or tomato? How much is enough? I am not going to give my food a relationship status. I will, instead, be viewing it as a gift...either good or bad....worthy or not worthy of consuming.
If food is my friend, it takes the place of my true friend and helper, God. I should be going to Him in prayer when I need comfort or when I want to celebrate. I'm not saying that I shouldn't eat during those times....but I am realizing that I should recognize the situation and either ask for help or give thanks for the celebration. Giving a proper perspective to my relationship with the food in front of me. Food is NOT my friend; God is.
If I view food as my enemy I see that it tempts, frustrates and depresses me. These are the same characteristics of Satan. In Genesis God gave us dominion over food...therefore it cannot be my enemy. Truly it is the lies of Satan that bring me to my knees in front of the plate rather than in front of a holy God asking for help. If I would daily take the time to view my food through the eyes of a healthy child of God, I would begin to view it for what it is; a gift.
So....where am I going with this today. Not all gifts are the same. Not all are worth keeping or consuming. Nor should i take on the gluttonous behavior of a greedy child hoarding gifts. As I eat today I am praying for help from my faithful friend. Is this fruit a good gift? This candy bar? This pizza, taco, cupcake, rice, tortilla chip, candy or tomato? How much is enough? I am not going to give my food a relationship status. I will, instead, be viewing it as a gift...either good or bad....worthy or not worthy of consuming.
Faithfully Fit days 18
Keeping Short Accounts Day 18
Food for thought: Remember that you don’t have to be perfect to lose weight. If you get off track, you just get right back on. Don’t let yourself sabotage the rest of the day or week or month. It’s like getting a flat tire—you fix it and move on, you don’t poke holes in the rest of your tires.
I have been thinking about this post for a few days now. It seems that lately I am continually poking holes in all my tires. The day might start off good; coffee....exercise....good lunch....and then it happens. I need a sweet fix. AKA Flat tire. Okay, so what....get back on track....yeah... right. The next thing I know I have raided the pantry, refrigerator or even been so ridiculous that I drive up to the corner store. I have sabotaged all the self control I had the first part of the day.
We all want a clean slate but we seem to want it to start after we are satisfied. Being the sinful creatures we are, we indulge ourselves knowing that tomorrow we can begin again....why not just go ahead and finish out the day with a BANG! Sounds like a great plan; except that tomorrow doesn't really hold a clean slate. We are still up in calories resulting in even more poundage as we compound all those flat tires together. Each day we sabotage ourselves, we add a day of suffering to our current condition....possibly even adding more days if the flat tires become too numerous.
At some point I said to myself, "Look, LeAnn...you can either decide that now is the time...or you can find yourself in this same place tomorrow, next week or a year from now." I held to that thought for a solid year. Telling myself that just one pound (a very doable amount) of fat loss a week would be 52 at the end of the year and that would be better than staying the same. Right? On the occasion that I screwed up, I would fix the tire and start fresh on the journey.
So why can't I get back to that train of thought? I know how to get there but I am just choosing not to. I suspect that I have become comfortable with the weight loss success I have had and am now just opting for the status quo because I don't want to put out the effort again. It's hard work. I realize I am able to eat almost anything....within reason...as long as I keep exercising. It is a nice place to be in but it won't get me to my goal.
All this to bring me back to the short accounts. Matthew 25 says: Agree with your adversary quickly In other words: take care of your issues as soon as you can. That is how we get to the clean slate. Just like confessing our sins to God gives us a clean slate.
When we have issues with another person we need to work them out in a timely manner. I know for myself, when I have had a lingering problem hanging over my head it takes an emotional toll on me. It adds to my emotional eating. Unfinished business keeps us from moving forward, upward and onward. I try to conquer the angst, frustration, sadness, fear, or loss with food. When I finally work it out with my adversary the weight it released from my shoulder is great. I can get back to the business of living, serving God with a clean heart. Free of guilt. No need to continue living in the muck and mire until the next morning when I can be free, clean...today.
Can I then apply this concept to food? Each time I eat something not in my plan I should immediately confess it and start fresh right then. There is no reason to wait; to continue wallowing in the guilt that only leads me to more indulgences. Fix it and move on.
Today was a good day. My slate is still clean. Let's see if I can start applying this concept again without delay.
Food for thought: Remember that you don’t have to be perfect to lose weight. If you get off track, you just get right back on. Don’t let yourself sabotage the rest of the day or week or month. It’s like getting a flat tire—you fix it and move on, you don’t poke holes in the rest of your tires.
I have been thinking about this post for a few days now. It seems that lately I am continually poking holes in all my tires. The day might start off good; coffee....exercise....good lunch....and then it happens. I need a sweet fix. AKA Flat tire. Okay, so what....get back on track....yeah... right. The next thing I know I have raided the pantry, refrigerator or even been so ridiculous that I drive up to the corner store. I have sabotaged all the self control I had the first part of the day.
We all want a clean slate but we seem to want it to start after we are satisfied. Being the sinful creatures we are, we indulge ourselves knowing that tomorrow we can begin again....why not just go ahead and finish out the day with a BANG! Sounds like a great plan; except that tomorrow doesn't really hold a clean slate. We are still up in calories resulting in even more poundage as we compound all those flat tires together. Each day we sabotage ourselves, we add a day of suffering to our current condition....possibly even adding more days if the flat tires become too numerous.
At some point I said to myself, "Look, LeAnn...you can either decide that now is the time...or you can find yourself in this same place tomorrow, next week or a year from now." I held to that thought for a solid year. Telling myself that just one pound (a very doable amount) of fat loss a week would be 52 at the end of the year and that would be better than staying the same. Right? On the occasion that I screwed up, I would fix the tire and start fresh on the journey.
So why can't I get back to that train of thought? I know how to get there but I am just choosing not to. I suspect that I have become comfortable with the weight loss success I have had and am now just opting for the status quo because I don't want to put out the effort again. It's hard work. I realize I am able to eat almost anything....within reason...as long as I keep exercising. It is a nice place to be in but it won't get me to my goal.
All this to bring me back to the short accounts. Matthew 25 says: Agree with your adversary quickly In other words: take care of your issues as soon as you can. That is how we get to the clean slate. Just like confessing our sins to God gives us a clean slate.
When we have issues with another person we need to work them out in a timely manner. I know for myself, when I have had a lingering problem hanging over my head it takes an emotional toll on me. It adds to my emotional eating. Unfinished business keeps us from moving forward, upward and onward. I try to conquer the angst, frustration, sadness, fear, or loss with food. When I finally work it out with my adversary the weight it released from my shoulder is great. I can get back to the business of living, serving God with a clean heart. Free of guilt. No need to continue living in the muck and mire until the next morning when I can be free, clean...today.
Can I then apply this concept to food? Each time I eat something not in my plan I should immediately confess it and start fresh right then. There is no reason to wait; to continue wallowing in the guilt that only leads me to more indulgences. Fix it and move on.
Today was a good day. My slate is still clean. Let's see if I can start applying this concept again without delay.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Faithfully Fit days 17
Day 17 Power in numbers:
Back in the beginning of my journey I invited a group of ladies at church to join me in playing "Biggest Loser". The premise of our game was to see who could lose the highest percentage of body weight. Sometimes a good challenge and a nice pot of money can encourage us to jump off the couch and get our heads in the game. I didn't win the pot of money ($200+) the first time but I received a much nicer prize. That awesome prize of accountability.
Accountability from others gave me staying power. I now had an ear to hear, new recipes, exercise partners and encouragement. I had surrounded myself with women who, like me, had nothing to lose and much to gain....or is it everything to lose and much to gain? LOL! We checked in once a week, talked about our successes and our failures and then with the encouragement of each other....moved ahead. My friend Cathy was my weight loss confidant. We got into the thick of our issues with food, exercise and all other reasons that we were now in this predicament. Had she not been there during that time I'm not entirely sure I would have been as successful as I was. (winning the second round of BL)
I encourage you to find someone to whom you can share your journey. Some one who can check up on you, go to the gym with you or to whom you can share your pain, joy, and successes.
Maybe you aren't ready to share with a buddy. That is okay... you do have a friend who is willing to help, listen and encourage you. He lives inside you. Ready, waiting...eager to Bless you if you just take the time to ask.
There are friends who pretend to be friends but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. (Prov. 18:24 RSV
Back in the beginning of my journey I invited a group of ladies at church to join me in playing "Biggest Loser". The premise of our game was to see who could lose the highest percentage of body weight. Sometimes a good challenge and a nice pot of money can encourage us to jump off the couch and get our heads in the game. I didn't win the pot of money ($200+) the first time but I received a much nicer prize. That awesome prize of accountability.
Accountability from others gave me staying power. I now had an ear to hear, new recipes, exercise partners and encouragement. I had surrounded myself with women who, like me, had nothing to lose and much to gain....or is it everything to lose and much to gain? LOL! We checked in once a week, talked about our successes and our failures and then with the encouragement of each other....moved ahead. My friend Cathy was my weight loss confidant. We got into the thick of our issues with food, exercise and all other reasons that we were now in this predicament. Had she not been there during that time I'm not entirely sure I would have been as successful as I was. (winning the second round of BL)
I encourage you to find someone to whom you can share your journey. Some one who can check up on you, go to the gym with you or to whom you can share your pain, joy, and successes.
Maybe you aren't ready to share with a buddy. That is okay... you do have a friend who is willing to help, listen and encourage you. He lives inside you. Ready, waiting...eager to Bless you if you just take the time to ask.
There are friends who pretend to be friends but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. (Prov. 18:24 RSV
Monday, May 16, 2011
Faithfully Fit days 15-16
As we enter our third week of devotions I see we are focusing on prayer.
Early on I was at a loss for what to pray for regarding my weight issues. I know I cried out over and over the same thing. "Take this thorn away!" "Help me to lose the weight!" "Make me thin.....PLEASE!!!" I tried to be tricky and disguise my desires to be thin by trying to pray as though the weight loss would be for others and not just me." How silly to think that God didn't know the truth behind the prayers. Now I know that the Holy Spirit knew my wordless sighs...my aching groans. My personal truths. I just didn't know what they were or how to get out of the way. I would cry out in prayer and then take it all right back onto my own shoulders. I don't think I even KNEW what to pray for.
Romans 8:26 says: Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans.
If we don't know what to pray for we can trust that the Holy Spirit will intercede for us. I like trusting in that.
I also know that God tells us we can be specific in our prayer life. Are you? Do you know what or how to pray during this journey? Here is a challenge I took from my friend Charity a while back.
My first "it" is complacency. Go back and fill in the blank with that. How about lack of motivation, lack of resolve, depression, stress, backsliding, selfishness or...my favorite...THE BRAT WITHIN. (I wrote more on the BRAT back at the beginning of my blogging)
Once you have figured out your "it" you can pray much more specifically for your personal journey. Ask the Spirit to intercede for you on these issues.
Once I knew my "it" I was able to give them to Him. Knowing exactly what I had prayed for made it much easier to see the answers when they came. If you expect an answer you will be more alert and far more likely to see the answer when it comes.
What is your "it"?
Early on I was at a loss for what to pray for regarding my weight issues. I know I cried out over and over the same thing. "Take this thorn away!" "Help me to lose the weight!" "Make me thin.....PLEASE!!!" I tried to be tricky and disguise my desires to be thin by trying to pray as though the weight loss would be for others and not just me." How silly to think that God didn't know the truth behind the prayers. Now I know that the Holy Spirit knew my wordless sighs...my aching groans. My personal truths. I just didn't know what they were or how to get out of the way. I would cry out in prayer and then take it all right back onto my own shoulders. I don't think I even KNEW what to pray for.
Romans 8:26 says: Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans.
If we don't know what to pray for we can trust that the Holy Spirit will intercede for us. I like trusting in that.
I also know that God tells us we can be specific in our prayer life. Are you? Do you know what or how to pray during this journey? Here is a challenge I took from my friend Charity a while back.
Replace the word "it" with your own word(s) regarding your journey back to health and fitness. What is "it" that knocks you off your plan when it comes to eating healthy and/or exercise.
1. I have really had to check IT (fill in your own "it") a lot this week.
2. IT has been a monster hanging over my shoulder all week.
3. I'm back into the swing of things but IT has been hard to shake.
My first "it" is complacency. Go back and fill in the blank with that. How about lack of motivation, lack of resolve, depression, stress, backsliding, selfishness or...my favorite...THE BRAT WITHIN. (I wrote more on the BRAT back at the beginning of my blogging)
Once you have figured out your "it" you can pray much more specifically for your personal journey. Ask the Spirit to intercede for you on these issues.
Once I knew my "it" I was able to give them to Him. Knowing exactly what I had prayed for made it much easier to see the answers when they came. If you expect an answer you will be more alert and far more likely to see the answer when it comes.
What is your "it"?
Faithfully Fit day 14-15
Day 14 Looking up. This reading encouraged us to look up...be aware of our surroundings. What is it around you that God is trying to show you? Is there more to this journey than just the obvious calorie counting? The monotonous hum of the elliptical machine? What is He trying to teach you?
I know there is more to this journey. I've found now...looking back and looking around, that had I just looked up, I might have seen much earlier the preplanned route he had set for me. I hadn't realized that the real gift was not going to be in the weight loss but rather in the gift of serving others in a new way. Serving from my heart. Not out of obligation or just because someone thought I had a gift for this or that. My joy would now come from a life that involved encouraging, serving and loving others.
As I look up and out into the future I hope I don't miss the signs and signals of God. I hope to keep my eyes focused daily on Him and his plan for me. There is delight in living out the will of God. How different all this looks to me as I consider what His point of view must be.
I know there is more to this journey. I've found now...looking back and looking around, that had I just looked up, I might have seen much earlier the preplanned route he had set for me. I hadn't realized that the real gift was not going to be in the weight loss but rather in the gift of serving others in a new way. Serving from my heart. Not out of obligation or just because someone thought I had a gift for this or that. My joy would now come from a life that involved encouraging, serving and loving others.
As I look up and out into the future I hope I don't miss the signs and signals of God. I hope to keep my eyes focused daily on Him and his plan for me. There is delight in living out the will of God. How different all this looks to me as I consider what His point of view must be.
Friday, May 13, 2011
Faithfully Fit Day 13
Obsession: Food as obsession
"As he thinketh...so is he" (Prov. 23:7) Todays lesson pointed out an obsession with food. While we eat to live we should not live to eat. Food may be necessary but it shouldn't be our focus.
For years I had an obsession with food. I thought day and night about food. Upon completion of one meal, I would begin thinking about the next snack or meal on the horizon. When the family would finally all be in bed I would raid the kitchen. Something, anything to feed the obsession. I realize now that the reasons for the obsession were two-fold. One was the physical addiction to the food. The more bad carbs I ate the more I wanted. A normal reaction of the body. The second was my mental/emotional addiction to it. I ate food to appease all kinds of heartache, boredom, frustration, etc.
Food...UNLIKE most other obsessions/addictions cannot be dropped cold turkey. We die without it. So it is always there tempting and compelling us to act. Food...LIKE other obsessions/addictions takes over our lives. Keeping us shackled to it and making it hard for us to focus on the really important things in life.
When I was young we had a family visitor come to our home in Colorado. She and her children had traveled a long way, from Minnesota, to visit us. I may not have all the facts right but what I remember is that we were having pizza for dinner. We didn't have a lot of money and there were a lot of us eating the small amount we could afford. Someone in our family had, in the eyes of our visitor, eaten more than their fair share. This caused a huge rift and the visitors abruptly left and drove back to Minnesota. Had food become an obsession for our visitor? Was their desire to have what they wanted, their fair share, worth the pain and anger that it caused? Is the after affect (poor health and weight gain) of our food obsession worth the pain, anger, low self-esteem and depression that it brings? Could we find something more worthy of our time and attention? Can we take a moment to look at what sort of end result our obsession treats us to?
Over the last few years I have developed a new point of view regarding food. I have found something else to think about and spend my time on.
Our author writes: People who are willing to spend a healthy share of their spiritual energy caring about the pain of others will not have room in their hearts for unhealthy self-obsession. (unhealthy food obsession-mine)
I aspire to do this. I hope to care for others like Jesus would. To see the fruit come forth of a life focused where it should be. Finally. There is plenty of work to be done and "hey" why not reap the harvest of lost weight at the same time as you reap the blessing of God saying "Job well done!"
That is not to say I am right on track all the time. I occasionally fall back into my thoughts of food and self-centeredness. But....eating healthy quickly curbs the desires of my body to eat poorly and doing what I am taught to do in scripture...to seek Him first, replaces the need to use food to satisfy me emotionally.
"Brothers and sisters, think about the things that are good and worthy of praise. Think about the things that are true and honorable and right and pure and beautiful and respected...And the God who gives peace will be with you." (Phil. 4:8-9)
"As he thinketh...so is he" (Prov. 23:7) Todays lesson pointed out an obsession with food. While we eat to live we should not live to eat. Food may be necessary but it shouldn't be our focus.
For years I had an obsession with food. I thought day and night about food. Upon completion of one meal, I would begin thinking about the next snack or meal on the horizon. When the family would finally all be in bed I would raid the kitchen. Something, anything to feed the obsession. I realize now that the reasons for the obsession were two-fold. One was the physical addiction to the food. The more bad carbs I ate the more I wanted. A normal reaction of the body. The second was my mental/emotional addiction to it. I ate food to appease all kinds of heartache, boredom, frustration, etc.
Food...UNLIKE most other obsessions/addictions cannot be dropped cold turkey. We die without it. So it is always there tempting and compelling us to act. Food...LIKE other obsessions/addictions takes over our lives. Keeping us shackled to it and making it hard for us to focus on the really important things in life.
When I was young we had a family visitor come to our home in Colorado. She and her children had traveled a long way, from Minnesota, to visit us. I may not have all the facts right but what I remember is that we were having pizza for dinner. We didn't have a lot of money and there were a lot of us eating the small amount we could afford. Someone in our family had, in the eyes of our visitor, eaten more than their fair share. This caused a huge rift and the visitors abruptly left and drove back to Minnesota. Had food become an obsession for our visitor? Was their desire to have what they wanted, their fair share, worth the pain and anger that it caused? Is the after affect (poor health and weight gain) of our food obsession worth the pain, anger, low self-esteem and depression that it brings? Could we find something more worthy of our time and attention? Can we take a moment to look at what sort of end result our obsession treats us to?
Over the last few years I have developed a new point of view regarding food. I have found something else to think about and spend my time on.
Our author writes: People who are willing to spend a healthy share of their spiritual energy caring about the pain of others will not have room in their hearts for unhealthy self-obsession. (unhealthy food obsession-mine)
I aspire to do this. I hope to care for others like Jesus would. To see the fruit come forth of a life focused where it should be. Finally. There is plenty of work to be done and "hey" why not reap the harvest of lost weight at the same time as you reap the blessing of God saying "Job well done!"
That is not to say I am right on track all the time. I occasionally fall back into my thoughts of food and self-centeredness. But....eating healthy quickly curbs the desires of my body to eat poorly and doing what I am taught to do in scripture...to seek Him first, replaces the need to use food to satisfy me emotionally.
"Brothers and sisters, think about the things that are good and worthy of praise. Think about the things that are true and honorable and right and pure and beautiful and respected...And the God who gives peace will be with you." (Phil. 4:8-9)
Faithfully Fit day 5-6 extended
I want to add just a thought in regards to an earlier post for days 5-6. My wallet was either lost or stolen and $110+ was taken from it.
When bad things happen I tend to ask WHY! Why me? Why now? Why this? I don't think I recalled asking that this time. I just accepted it and trusted that God had a person out there eating better, paying a bill or doing something good with that money. I had just shared a few days ago with someone that when you give, either monetarily or of your time and energy, it comes back to you tenfold. In the last week I received a gift card in the mail. I thought...Cool! That is a blessing coming back. Then today the FlyGirlZ gave me a card with a gift inside. I am truly blessed. So....back to the WHY. I'm still not sure why but I can definitely say that it might have been a lesson in giving that God wanted me/us to learn. Perhaps, too, it was my opportunity to look around me and see the richness He has afforded me by surrounding me with such wonderful people. I love the FlyGirlZ.
When bad things happen I tend to ask WHY! Why me? Why now? Why this? I don't think I recalled asking that this time. I just accepted it and trusted that God had a person out there eating better, paying a bill or doing something good with that money. I had just shared a few days ago with someone that when you give, either monetarily or of your time and energy, it comes back to you tenfold. In the last week I received a gift card in the mail. I thought...Cool! That is a blessing coming back. Then today the FlyGirlZ gave me a card with a gift inside. I am truly blessed. So....back to the WHY. I'm still not sure why but I can definitely say that it might have been a lesson in giving that God wanted me/us to learn. Perhaps, too, it was my opportunity to look around me and see the richness He has afforded me by surrounding me with such wonderful people. I love the FlyGirlZ.
Faithfully Fit - Day8-12
Since my blog site has been down a few days and because I have been quite busy my blogging is behind.
This week is on Point of View. How do I see my life...negatively or positively. How He looks at us. How we should look at exercise. How we should expect results. How we CAN expect results and lastly...How we need to view our future.
This journey, just passing the two year mark, gives me an opportunity to look back and see how my POV has changed. I can honestly say that before the weight loss journey started I was becoming more and more negative. I was unhappy in my life, my weight, my relationship with my family and my relationship with God. I was definitely looking at my life through the eyes of despair and negativity. Though I knew that God loved me I certainly didn't find any self worth in me when it came to the Lord wanting to use me for any real purpose. I had lost my way. I was able to stay near the path but not on it. Continually tromping through the briarpatch instead of just staying safe on the path laid out so clearly in God's word. I think I was like the Brer Rabbit messing around with the tar baby. I would get one hand in a mess...then the other while trying to free the first. Okay...now use the feet to get the hands off; oop...now the other. Pretty soon I'm stuck with my hands and feet all up in the Tar Baby's grill.
I wasn't exercising much; if ever. When I did it was short lived and spotty. I didn't expect results because I didn't have the faith to expect them. Did I believe God could? Yes! Did I believe it for me? No! I was too busy trying to do it on my own and have faith only in myself. I hadn't tried to view my future in a realistic way....not even in a "God can do miracles" way.
What has changed in two years?
I am happy! Most days I wake with great expectations. (after the coffee of course) Though having lost just over half of the weight I would like to lose, I am already changed immensely. I haven't cried myself to sleep in I don't know how long. Who I am...I like. Room for improvement....Sure. ALWAYS!! Everyday I notice something new that God is doing in or around me; involving me. I know He loves me despite my flaws. He sees me as valuable; His child.
Results. Expecting them and looking ahead. I didn't know what to expect when I started but the more successes there were, the more I expected. Growing like faith. Each time a faith seed was planted and grew the more I wanted to plant. The things I had hoped for in my goals, that I had written down prior to the journey, were coming true...small things and large things. Fitting in the rides at Kings Dominion. Wearing clothes not bought at a plus-size store. Doing physical activity with my family without dying in the process. Still breathing after a hard flight of stairs. Going to bed without thoughts of dying overnight. Waking to see a new day. These are the successes that having faith has provided. As each grew, God was watering them, sending His sunshine to nurture them. He has even added some successes I hadn't anticipated ever wanting or acheiving. Isn't He good??? As my faith in Him grew...so then my successes.
So today, Day 12 is on possibility. I have not looked much at the new possibilities because I am having so much fun enjoying and living with the possibilities He has me in now. Revelling in the joy that He has afforded me at this moment in time. Wonderful job, wonderful old friends, wonderful new friends. A healthier body; active, alive and smaller. (wink, wink ...65# down) Zumba, and most definitely the joy of my ever growing relationship with Him. Todays reading asks us to consider the possibilities that lay ahead. I guess I need to think on that a bit more but for starters; I want to lose the other half of the excess weight. I want to mentor others. I want to see more women join me on this journey. I want to teach other classes than just Zumba. Growing in Him but shrinking to self. Gonna dream big....talk show host, first woman president, lotto winnner... MAYBE this is getting away from me just a bit.
If I stay were I am I could learn to be content. I am content for the most part but there is a still small voice urging me on. I will follow.
Onward, Upward and shaking it up one Zumba class at a time!
Monday, May 9, 2011
Faithfully Fit day 7
Doing the right thing:
Why is doing the right thing so easy in some instances and not so easy in others?
I have come to the understanding in the last few years that fat people (I am one of them) know how to lose weight. We just don't. We know what to eat, how to exercise, what not to eat, what circumstances are bad for us etc. We have read the books and articles, tried all the diets known to man. Yet...on we go with no change except to possibly get larger. I choose to do wrong at the expense of my body, mind and spirit.
Why do I choose to do the wrong thing for me, for my body, His temple? Let's be honest; I don't like waiting. I live in a culture where we can get, buy or borrow almost anything. I choose the wrong thing over and over because my selfishness (that little brat inside) is pulling me to do what is wrong. We are taught we can have anything we want. We aren't always taught that we MIGHT have to work for it or that it is an accrued thing. I want to satisfy the craving now. I can worry about it later. And worry I do!
Now I have accrued the excess baggage and weight of my wrong choices. It isn't until I cry out in frustration, anger and sadness over my present situation that I find myself humbled enough to accept help. What is it they say? " The first step is acknowledging I have a problem." Recognizing our weakness. In my weakness God can come it and make me strong. It is when I humble myself that I can finally see and ask for His Strength.
As I close out my week of surrender I have opted to pray more for the things I need to surrender.
- my negativity and fear.
- my next meal and every future meal, one at a time.
- my plans in favor of God's plan.
Onward to week 2; Point of view.
Romans 7:15-25 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[a] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.
Why is doing the right thing so easy in some instances and not so easy in others?
I have come to the understanding in the last few years that fat people (I am one of them) know how to lose weight. We just don't. We know what to eat, how to exercise, what not to eat, what circumstances are bad for us etc. We have read the books and articles, tried all the diets known to man. Yet...on we go with no change except to possibly get larger. I choose to do wrong at the expense of my body, mind and spirit.
Why do I choose to do the wrong thing for me, for my body, His temple? Let's be honest; I don't like waiting. I live in a culture where we can get, buy or borrow almost anything. I choose the wrong thing over and over because my selfishness (that little brat inside) is pulling me to do what is wrong. We are taught we can have anything we want. We aren't always taught that we MIGHT have to work for it or that it is an accrued thing. I want to satisfy the craving now. I can worry about it later. And worry I do!
Now I have accrued the excess baggage and weight of my wrong choices. It isn't until I cry out in frustration, anger and sadness over my present situation that I find myself humbled enough to accept help. What is it they say? " The first step is acknowledging I have a problem." Recognizing our weakness. In my weakness God can come it and make me strong. It is when I humble myself that I can finally see and ask for His Strength.
As I close out my week of surrender I have opted to pray more for the things I need to surrender.
- my negativity and fear.
- my next meal and every future meal, one at a time.
- my plans in favor of God's plan.
Onward to week 2; Point of view.
Romans 7:15-25 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[a] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.
21 So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. 22 For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; 23 but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. 24What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? 25Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!
So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God’s law, but in my sinful nature[b] a slave to the law of sin.
Friday, May 6, 2011
Faithfully Fit - Day 5 and 6
So if I am going to be completely honest I must tell you that after reading my devotion yesterday I was uninspired to write. The reading was on God's Power and how it is a resource that we should be using to help us in our journey. It spoke for itself and I just really didn't have much to add.....until 4:30 a.m.
To start, yesterday was a hard day. I either lost my wallet or it was stolen. I had been sick to my stomach about it all morning. Praying often that it would show up intact. There was a lot of money in it at the time because I had just sold a boatload of Zumbawear. My thoughts were on the money and the credit cards. Then...I received a call that it had been found. Everything, credit cards, license, etc., was all there.....except the money. I breathed a sigh of relief and tried hard to just give in to the fact that someone must have needed that money more than I. I thanked God for the return of the wallet and hoped that He would make the person who had the money feel guilty about it. Well now....that isn't very nice. Is it!!! Okay, so, then I just hoped he had allowed if for some reason or other, though I would never no why. All day I tried to figure out just how much money was in there. Replaying the last 24 hrs over and over in my mind.
Why does this all matter? Because ALL day I wanted to eat, eat, eat....nothing satisfied the craving in my heart; the ache; the questions. I tried to dismiss the drama in my head and finally went to sleep hoping that morning would bring with it a little less sadness and frustration. I needed to let this go. What exactly does "let go and let God" mean????
4;30 am...woke and couldn't sleep. Sitting in the dark my mind went to the money again...things were coming together....I remembered where I had spent money and approx. how much was taken...roughly $110. Not nearly as much as I originally thought. That had me feeling a wee bit better. I lay there praying for sleep.....it didn't come. I gave in and got up. My mind drifted to the absence of inspiration to write last night. That is when He came. I can rely on Him to get me through; to give me answers and some peace. If He is a God with all the power to raise Christ from the dead, to hold back the waters of the Red sea, capable of healing the sick, blind and weary then He most certainly had the power to help me with this blip in the road.
I was reminded that I have just 8 weeks until I leave for Zumba convention. In that time I need to have healing in my knees if I intend to dance all 4 days and then come back to a very busy month of teaching. That will require discipline to do my physical therapy every day, three times a day. UGHH! AND....I wanted to lose 30 more pounds by then...seems unlikely now but I CAN call on His power.
I'm almost afraid to write it down here, publicly. What if I fail? What if I am no different in that amount of time? Will it be evidence that I didn't trust Him?
I am giving it up to Him. Praying specifically that He gives me reminders that I shouldn't eat THAT; that He take away the cravings, and that he lay His healing hands on my knees.
All that being said....He showed me that I did have something to write about; His POWER. Will I use the resources He has given me?
Do not worry about anything, but pray and ask God for everything you need, always giving thanks. And God's peace, which is so great we cannot understand it, will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7)
Food for thought: Compulsive eating decreases in direct proportion to the growth of our faith.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Faithfully Fit day 4
Inside out:
1 Samuel 16:7 - Don't look at how handsome Eliab is or how tall he is, because I have not chosen him. God does not see the same way people see. People look at the outside of a person, but the LORD looks at the heart.
When I see a beautiful dress on the rack I might notice the great colors, the shape, they way it hangs. I can visualize a place I might wear it; a party, a date, to church. The designer shows me what she wants me to see. She made it to be desired and accepted by buyers, worn for her notoriety. But, if you turn it inside out you will see a much different garment. You will see all the stitching and hemlines. How well the item was put together will be evident. A well put together dress will be beautiful for years to come. It will be wearable even after a multitude of washings and wearing. A poorly sewn interior will soon become unwearable; splitting at the seams, missing buttons, unraveling at the edges. A great dress will be beautifully stitched together, showing the craftsmanship of the designer on the inside as well as the out.
The human body is like that. The outside is often a reflection of what is going on inside. How long it lasts will be determined by what lies inside. If I choose to lose weight and change my exterior without seeking the internal changes as well, will the changes last. How long before I am back where I started out? In my past experience, changing my exterior didn't last long because I hadn't done the important work. I hadn't allowed the redesigning of the interior.
My heavenly father is my Creator/designer. I tried and tried to mend myself here and there to create an illusion of wholeness and beauty. But change just on the outside won't make me new again. Only the original Creator has that capability. He knows exactly how many stitches it took to put me together. He knows every seam, dart and hem. If over time I have allowed the wear and tear to take the beautiful out of my garment, shouldn't I go to my Creator to get it back to the awesome creation it once was. He may need to open up the seams, painful as that may be, to put it back together again.
I may be fooling the people around me but my heavenly Father is not fooled. He is watching and waiting for me to come to Him for healing. He has looked into my heart, that He created, and knows what it will take to heal me, free me. Getting to the inside of the issues that created the destruction in me is the only way to possibly lose the weight and KEEP it OFF. I must be willing to ask for help, to surrender to the master crafter. I must be willing to face the truths He reveals.
I can't wait to hear the Lord say "Look! I am making everything new!" Rev. 21:5
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Faithfully Fit day 3
There are many things I can't control in my life and many things I should but don't. Or do I?? Is my lack of control actually me trying to be IN control? Is the lack of control me saying "yeah...I'm driving this car and I can drive it recklessly if I want to."? I think I am in control when everyone else knows I am most certainly not.
Compulsive overeating...that is one I can control....but often don't. I am a rebellious child. Rebelling against anyone saying I can or can't eat/do what I want. There are two characters in my body...me...and a brat that lives inside me that wants her way every time, despite the nudging of the Holy Spirit, not to eat one more thing. This is so indicative of the battle that rages in my head every time I am faced with making that choice. (I know I shouldn't but I want to eat it. I can start over tomorrow. It's just one thing.)
Typically rules are put into place to protect, guide etc. I realize that rules regarding food and what is healthy or not varies with each persons diet plan, allergies etc. But, in general, there are healthy foods and unhealthy foods. I know the difference. Eating the things I shouldn't is a choice to be disobedient to the rules , to be rebellious. For the moment...I think I am in control. In the long run....I'm not. So why, if rules are generally for our benefit, do I think that breaking the rules is a good thing. It doesn't do my any favors to eat that chocolate, soda or second helping. It only further delays my journey. It breaks my resolve and whittles away my spirit. Who am I rebelling against? The food police?? No....I'm rebelling against against myself. It is me who, via my rebelliousness, has delayed or dissolved my plans to live, look and feel better. My pain becomes their (friends and family) pain as they watch me struggle. Lastly...it is me rebelling against God. He seeks to help me, sends me reminders. Only to find me telling him more oft than I should "I'm in control."
My prayer today as I humbled myself before God was to be attentive to the leadings of Him and for the discipline to tell my inner brat NO. That I would find myself obedient in the plan to clean up His temple. Well....as far as I can tell, I am sweeping away the cobwebs one at a time. Anyone have a dust mop and some spare time? I can use a little help.
Monday, May 2, 2011
Faithfully fit day 2
Good reading today. It reminded me of so many conversations with clients over the last few years. I AM the problem in my personal universe.
I can't begin to number the many many times that I expressed to others why I couldn't lose weight, why I couldn't focus on the task at hand. I said I didn't have time in my day. My children required to much of my energy. I didn't want to have to cook something different for myself. Maybe when the kids are a little more grown up, maybe when they are in school full time, when they are more self-sufficient, when they go off to college.
After finally achieving some success with my diet and exercise I had a paradigm shift of the mind. I realized that people really do exactly what they really want to do. But...there is a hierarchy to the order in which we chase things. I wanted many things; to play on FB, to watch TV, to sleep, to go out with friends for a meal. What I wanted at the moment....usually the easiest thing to satisfy me at the time, was my top pick. So you see, for me, it was a matter of doing exactly what I wanted to do. The problem....was ME!
I can have a desire to lose weight, win a million dollars or own a yacht. That desire doesn't make it so, nor did the tears, whining and complaining. It was when that desire became a passion that the beginning stages of discipline began in me. Now I realize that in order for me to really achieve what I desire I have to find a passion for it. Easier said than done.
How does that passion come? It seems to me that that is the magic pill that we each so desperately search for. We should have a light switch right? We chase after every diet pill, diet program, therapist, surgery, book, exercise equipment until we have exhausted not only our pocketbook but also our spirit.
After a year and some of losing I plateaued for a year; only losing about 15 total lbs in the second year. I knew exactly what I had done or rather quit doing to cause this. Do you know I reverted back to some of my old thinking patterns. Looking for the quick fix. How ridiculous. There I was searching for the magic pill again.
There was never just one thing that ignited that passion. It seemed to have been a bunch of things coming together all at the right time. God is so good that way. He orchestrates my life...adding just the right instrument at the right time; setting the tempo; creating the melody as He saw fit. I had to be ready for the music. I had to open myself up to being disciplined. I had to be willing to look at myself and see that I was the problem. I had been trying to do it all on my own when He told me that I should let Him carry my burden. Once I saw my inability, my areas of failure I could then pray specifically and fervently for the direction He wanted to give me. Perhaps passion comes out of recognition that we are the problem and He is willing to help me fix it. Could that passion be the Holy Spirit working in me spurring me on.
Now...two weeks into my renewed recognition that it is Me that is the problem, my passion has been reignited.
-Let your life reflect God today!
LeAnn
Faithfully Fit day 1
Day one:
This week is based on surrender. Surrendering control of our eating to God. Eph. 3:20 -He is able to do "much much more than anything we can ask or imagine."
It helps to know from where we come to understand where we are and where we are headed. I began gaining weight in my teen years. For the first time in my life, there was plenty to eat but there was also...for the first time, plenty of sadness. In hindsight I see that plenty of food was plenty filling for the ache in my heart.
It wouldn't be until years later that I recognized the connection between my weight issues and my personal issues. By then I was completely submerged in unhealthy habits and no self discipline when it came to food.
Even as the pain and issues of childhood subsided I was still left with the habits. No longer eating to mask that particular pain, I ate because I loved food and the false satisfaction that is reminded me of; like the sweet scent of childhood memory. As new issues reared there heads I would continue in the old pattern of emotional eating until that issue resolved and then was just that many pounds heavier; in a prison of my own making.
I love this quote by Maya Angelou: "I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better."
Now I do know better. I know I need to surrender my emotional eating and lack of self-discipline to the Lord. With Him holding the compass on this journey there is much more ground to be covered than if I was holding it myself. His compass is more accurate then my reading of the sun and stars.
I hope you found your own insight today. God Bless!
It wouldn't be until years later that I recognized the connection between my weight issues and my personal issues. By then I was completely submerged in unhealthy habits and no self discipline when it came to food.
Even as the pain and issues of childhood subsided I was still left with the habits. No longer eating to mask that particular pain, I ate because I loved food and the false satisfaction that is reminded me of; like the sweet scent of childhood memory. As new issues reared there heads I would continue in the old pattern of emotional eating until that issue resolved and then was just that many pounds heavier; in a prison of my own making.
I love this quote by Maya Angelou: "I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better."
Now I do know better. I know I need to surrender my emotional eating and lack of self-discipline to the Lord. With Him holding the compass on this journey there is much more ground to be covered than if I was holding it myself. His compass is more accurate then my reading of the sun and stars.
I hope you found your own insight today. God Bless!
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